as the merQree rises

The Thought That Kills

2011-03-10T00:45:00.000-08:00

I cannot think. And I can't lie. Nothing comes into my way, nothing in my mind. Bearing a cross, losing my soul. No nail given, God forgiven..No one's there to guide this blind.

Get off this place. Total disgrace. Please don't leave me, try to kill me, I won't even blink, I'll die.

Silent and cold. Precious and sold. No life living, where's the giving? Please just spare me from my mind

Make it stop

2009-06-26T13:21:00.000-07:00

my mind is her resting place
buried inside my head
voices whispering, haunting and bleeding
she's dead and i'm there
make it stop
make it stop

its just a cut make it stop make it stop
a million voices in my head, trying to tell me that she's dead

it's just a cut
make it stop
MAKE IT STOP

and when i remember these, promises that have been left undone
my body stops and my heart
goes faster in beating
she's there she hates me
make it stop
make it stop

symphony of melancholy, repeating it self to me
finding a way out but i find my self always looking back

its just a cut make it stop make it stop
a million voices in my head, trying to tell me that she's dead

it's just a cut
make it stop
MAKE IT STOP

and if get my self released, from a hell that she has unleashed
my fingers moving towards but i can't set my self free
my soul depents on how she acts, sometimes its numb sometimes reacts
my mind is blurry once again before i die by my own hands

its just a cut make it stop make it stop
a million voices in my head, trying to tell me that she's dead

it's just a cut
make it stop
MAKE IT STOP

its just a cut make it stop make it stop
this time the end will take me near, i won't be here, i won't stay here

it's just a cut
make it stop
MAKE IT STOP!

under construction

2008-08-24T07:18:00.001-07:00

the clocks are moving backwards
time actually heals all our pains
the sun no longer rises
and there's peace in every corner of the earth

the moon tells us what to do
our wishes are finally coming true
love is everywhere now
and hatred, has no place in our hearts

we must see what we created out of this misery
then we will, understand the factor of our devastation
so we bleed, till a day like this one never comes
so we die, alone while we lived together

Witten by a dying heart

2008-07-27T07:36:00.000-07:00

as i get old i realize
that my life was filled with lies
i thought i'll never make it through
as if there was nothing i could do

but now that i've become that old
i never thought it would feel cold
and as i see my self at this point
there's no one left to disappoint

my body's scared, my body's bruised from all this pain
it took some years, it made my fears inside my brain
Will I be fine? Will I be alright in that place?
it seems that no one is familiar with my case

my body starts to treble
i guess it tries to reassemble
all the pieces back together
before i disappear forever

another song, another psalm i tried to make
i don't know why, i don't know how much i can take
Will I be fine? Will I be alright in that place?
nobody knows, nobody really saw my face

i'm leaving this world
i already started to feel cold
it's not just because i got old
but it's time for me to speak the untold
but please don't be sad cause of this
my body's gone my spirit's here
but please don't be sad cause of this
i won't be here but i'll be near

dear beloved, we have gathered here today to say good bye to our selves

i'm leaving this world
i already started to feel cold
it's not just because i got old
but it's time for me to speak the untold
but please don't be sad cause of this
my body's gone my spirit's here
but please don't be sad cause of this
i won't be here but i'll be near

dear beloved, we have gathered here today to say good bye to our selves

to our selves
to our selves
to our selves...

Requiem

2008-03-19T08:40:00.000-07:00

It's time..to search
within my selfish ego mind
and it feels, like a church
like when the essences are combined

Please divide me.
I know i'm reckless and stubborn.
Crucify me.
As if there's nothing left to torn.
Purify me.
I can't find reasons to be here.
Satisfy me.
Before i burst in the atmosphere

There's a dream..out there
that won't let go even if i beg
but i'm fully aware
that i'm contained in life's round keg

Clarify me.
Should i believe in a endless lie?
Justify me.
The reason i was born to die.
Identify me.
out of a million people's faces
Modify me.
So i can step with out your braces.

Please divide me. (please come with me)
I know i'm reckless and stubborn. (cause i know how to live)
Crucify me. (please let me be)
As if there's nothing left to torn. (i have a dozen of things to achieve)
Purify me. (come, follow me)
I can't find reasons to be here. (i'll show you places that no one screams)
Satisfy me. (you can be my turning key)
Before i burst in the atmosphere (we can be lost in this land of dreams)

Massive Ingorance

2007-12-28T03:09:00.000-08:00

they say that when you hear the flies
it's a symbolism that your angel dies
and bugs will always remain
inside your head and you cannot complain

when you're running...running to escape...
the horror..will not anticipate
and the witchcraft that...they did to you
will always haunt your thoughts then you know it's not true

there is silence in my mind's dome
and my aura burns, feels like i'm at home
in the mirror, reflections of his wings
my angel, dies from all of my sins

when you're screaming...sreaming for the truth
you just realized that no one...listens to the youth
my intentions...flames on wooden sticks
just surrender...before devil does his tricks

another symphony of a death parade
another sympathy of life's arcade
it's so ironic how things turn like that
when you're so fucked up and you can't even cut

i...will..not..obey...
i will not obey
i will not obey...

you can shout all you can but i
don't give a shit i covered my eye
just to cover the madness you have done
before i realise that you are really gone

i will not obey

I hope for...

2007-12-28T03:00:00.000-08:00

we prayed a million times again
it didn't worked, our sins remained
so disappointed, we weren't heard
our death parade is almost here...

and i hope for...
i hope for...
one mistake again.
and i hope for..
i hope for..
i hope for the end..
i keep on falling right to the end

it's silent and cold outside
my visions, haunt the place i hide
there is a dark room in my mind
where i keep voices one of a kind

and i hope for...
i hope for..
one mistake again
and i hope for
i hope for...
i hope for...
truth to come and end
the wise to kill them selves by their hand
and every crowd to be ruined by one bend
and things to follow to come in no trend
and i hope for....hope for
and i hope for....hope for
and i hope for...hope for
and i..hope for..the end

So swear...

2007-10-17T23:14:00.001-07:00

There was a time that i used to think
about our future,and everything
But then came the curse and took you away
And i have no reason to live another day.

Years have passed so i gave up
the love that we had has been already dumped

Remember the words that we both said like one
and don't forget the love we had cause ur gone:

So swear if you love me that you'll die with me
And if you're not tell me i won't make a scene..
The gun on my head is still pointing at me
Will take my life away and feed just for free..

Fish I

2007-10-17T23:10:00.000-07:00

Everytime i look at you makes me wanna see,everything in my mind.
And everytime i look at you,makes me wanna scream for the pains you've given to me

Pain,this is not pain,this is a hell,i have within me.
Soul,i have no soul,i sold that one out,when i met you.

And evething i despise in my self it's just me and no one understands it.
And everytime as i look at you,makes me sick,like the day i met you.

Trapped in the well

2007-10-17T22:49:00.001-07:00

i'm the creation,of the thoughts you left behind..
imagination,a most useful word for you the blind..
as i look up,as i look down,wherever i can blink my eyes
the same mistakes,same human errors breaking the ice.

I'm the creation,of the things you want to forget
an inspiration,to all the world that gets upset
my own reflection,my own enemy killed me
this time i'll stay there cause i no longer have to be.

I hate it when you call my names from the shadows,while i'm trying to get to your light
i know these words seems more like another depression, but i know they will end up this fight

i'm the illusion,on the mirror image of your sins
the anarchism,that lives within your eternal dreams
but save me God now that i want to take this life away
don't take me wrong,i am not supposed to be this way.

i'm the dreamer of a world that never seen more than gray
i am the shadow,of the punishment that you have to pay.
i can't pick a side,who will i believe or from whom i'll die
i am not that strong,all this madness kept me to deny

I hate it when you call my name from the shadows,while i'm trying to get to your light...
i know i'm forced to hide my own image,just to get you more satisfied..

but...save me god,now that my illusions are hunting my beliefs
take me out of here,though you were the one who broke my wings
i am not like you,i never ruined anyone
i am just a clue,in the most secretly little chat

remember this,one last thing
cause its the only thing i will say
i am not a god but i can hold the world for today
if this is what you want,then please just let me understand the truth...

I hate it when you call my names from the shadows,while i'm trying to get to your "light"..

as the merQree rises...

2007-10-17T22:41:00.000-07:00

and in the end...will there be a light for me too?or will my name be written into this book of death for the rest of eternity?
and so..i embrace the end...the end..the end is all i have left until the end
Countless times i heard my self,of calling up these names that i am not aware of
searching for the answers from a place within me but the well has trapped me in here
kill me while you have the chance before i breathe again
an elder to the deepest ocean of despair
crush like thunder,llike an ancient into the fresh air